My kids science teacher mercifully sent over a science packet for them to work through. I declare this entire moment in time has worn out its welcome. We home school even in normal times but normal home school looks nothing like this. On a normal week, they spend an entire day at our local conservatory and then Fridays our science teacher and robotics teacher come. In between, they are over-booked with activities.
Aside: I intend on reigning in these activities next year when they go back to traditional school. The over scheduling happened in a worried reach from an unsure mom who thought maybe everyone was right they wouldn’t know how to interact with others. (PS that’s a load of horse dung bigger than anything my beauty has ever dropped. Unless they mean teaching my kids the mercenary tactics of mind-fuck warfare and unfounded insecurities dished out by second rate suburban bullies. Yeah, we’re not missing anything. Hmm, this is another post. We’ll revisit later.)
Resume Original Thought:
They began conducting the first experiment on the worksheet. I was trying to stand in for our irreplaceable science teacher. I was failing miserably. At some point I realized the problem was me. So I excused my overreach and said, ‘I’ll be at my desk if you need me.’ And guess what, they navigated the experiment with competence and maturity. Lesson learned Mom, step off. It’s a hard lesson to learn letting go, not micromanaging and that goes for personal affairs and work affairs.
We form an idea in our heads that things need to get from point A to point E but they have to follow the path we envision when doing so. This is where it’s so easy to stifle potential in a child or an employee or yourself. Letting go, walking over to your desk and doing your damnedest to keep your nose out of it is not an easy task, especially for those perfectionists out there. You know who you are. I know I do.
Giving anyone the opportunity to form their individual processes for how to attack a problem is empowering in the best way. They will always look back at you in a fond light because you trusted them and stepped back so that they could become part of the creative process and not just a cog. Yes, trust is earned and that employee who comes late and leaves early and bitches the entire time they are at work doesn’t get the trust. But the one who works hard, does their best, yes makes mistakes, deserves the trust.
Once trust is given, that employee, or child, will soar and prove why this is such a necessary step. Otherwise, you become this sad one woman show where you’re never as good as you could be because you refuse help. Is anyone a Judy Blume fan? Remember Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret?. Remember when she tried to start a paper at camp but refused any help from anyone? She never really seemed to learn she was the problem with that project’s failure not the ones who came after and delegated chores and creative efforts to get the best possible product. Don’t be Margaret. (I say this as much for you as me.)
Otherwise you’ll be doing everything yourself and you won’t have anyone to blame but yourself.