I have two dogs and they are of a breed that was bred to protect the Tibetan temples. The one of my dogs stands by my glass doors and barks like a piercing nail into your head. We’re always yelling for her to stop. Poor thing. She’s wired this way. She really can’t help it. God knows if she could she wouldn’t end up on leash as often as she does.
It makes me think about the things we’re all wired to do in life. I’ve tried my hand at different careers but I was never brave enough to go after a creative career even though I now know I probably would have found my greatest success in such a career. I tend to be wildly insecure and I spent way too many years trying to find absolution in others and usually others who were more than willing to exploit my weaknesses for their own benefit.
Like my dog, these things along with so many other things buried deep in who I am I am simply wired to embrace. Sometimes you should, give a big two arm bear hug to your inner you, other times you need to take a scalpel and cut that destructive stuff out. Those are the hard leaps. I have no advice on how to do so other than one day at a time, one effort at a time.
When that toxic person comes knocking you can be a little slow to open the door, maybe crawl out a back window. They will find someone else to exploit and you may feel lonely without the attention but remember it was nothing healthy. When you see that job that doesn’t click the boxes you’ve been trained to think a job needs to click remember the man the movie ‘Stand And Deliver’ was based on left a high paying engineering job to teach high school math to high risk kids. That same man sells his program worldwide now and it has made him a multi-millionaire. It’s all in the hustle and innovation.
Don’t stifle instincts they exist to serve you. Start barking out that window. Big things are ahead.